Shout It Out!

When I was a kid Mom always used Tide.  It did the best job then and it does the best job now.  It always has and probably always will.  The only probably with Tide is you have to get a loan from the bank to buy it.  So it is with most other name brand laundry detergent these days, so I use a not so well known brand.  It does a good job too.  I’m satisfied with it and I don’t need to see the guy at the bank and fill out all the paperwork and have a credit check done.

When I was a kid a lot of new laundry products came out.  I remember Era came out and it had ‘enzymes’ in it.  I never heard of enzymes before.  They did this really cool demonstration of pouring the detergent on grass stains and it made it go away.  Come to think of it, I think they still use it in the ad along with some other stuff, or another detergent borrowed the concept for their own advertizing demonstration, anyway… I get confused; after all they all pretty much are the same once you step down from Tide.  The really cool thing that came out though was this spray on pre-wash stain remover stuff called Spray’n’Wash, along with Shout and another brand or two.  The cool thing about them is that on a lot of stuff they actually work, or at least helped to a degree.  Here lies my problem.

I married this man who thinks Spray’n’Wash and all its counterparts can remove any stain anywhere at any time.  In reality it ain’t so Joe.  Every woman knows that once a piece of clothing has gone through the dryer that stain is baked on and ain’t coming off with a crowbar or a power sander, end of story.  This man of mine for some reason thinks that the stains he got on his work jeans before we got married are my fault because I “don’t know how to do laundry”.  Yep… he said it… I “don’t know how to do laundry”.  I’m picking out his casket tomorrow.

This is not the first time we have had this “discussion”.  TJ has actually come out of his room on one occasion and told us to stop “fighting”.  I think this is the only thing in our marriage we’ve ever raised our voices about… well, on a weekly basis anyway.

On our final “discussion” of this topic I was “told” that “from now on there were to be no ‘new’ stains on top of the old stains”.  He was promptly told not to put any new stains on top of the old ones and I handed him his very own can of “SHOUT”.  It is his very own can.  He gets to keep it on his very own dresser on his very own side of the bed.  He gets to spray his very own stains and put his very own clothes in his very own hamper.  If he gets a stain on his very own clothes he can SHOUT IT OUT!