Avoiding the Workshop

I’ve been very busy the past few weeks and have neglected to blog for a while now.  What have I been doing with all of my time?  I have very little idea or recollection.  I’m sure it was “important” at the time, but not important enough to remember now.  Or I am just unable to recall…

 Let’s see…  We helped my sister-in-law inventory my mother-in-law’s estate.  We have been helping a sick friend – Dear hubby does most of it, I just help out by taking care of his mail and making sure his bills are paid on time while he’s not able to keep up with it.  I have also began indexing for FamilySearch.org and have become an arbitrator for them as well.  I’ve spent a good bit of time on this I suppose since I have the physical limitations that I do and it keeps my mind occupied and focused, and of course it is a great way for me to perform service in the Lord’s kingdom without being on my feet.

 I’ve been doing some organizing and re-organizing of little things around the house like my recipe box and craft supplies, and I have started planning a 60^th birthday party for dear husband… so far all I’ve accomplished is getting invitations in the mail.  I have NO idea what else I need to be doing at the moment for it other than some planning.  I’ve been looking on Pinterest for some ideas for a birthday cake but so far haven’t found anything that fits him or the occasion. 

I have found a few crafts to do but I find I really have to pace myself due to the arthritis in my hands and of course if I whip right through them (as I’d like to – I love things in mass) I run out of financial resources to have anything more to do.  I have returned to making cakes for family occasions but this too is somewhat difficult with the arthritis in my hands, but at least I can sit down and don’t have someone over my shoulder and a time clock ticking keeping me stressed out and sucking the enjoyment out of it.  My skills have certainly faded over the years and I think it will take more time than I originally thought it would to get them back.  It just isn’t coming to me as natural as it once did.  I’m a bit disappointed in the results so far but I suppose people who have never done a cake have an appreciation for my attempts anyway.  I do have a bit of a ways to go for certain.  I also have had to re-acquire equipment and supplies since I let them go years ago.  I’m also having sticker shock.  It will take a while to rebuild my supply of pans, tips, and a host of other necessities. 

I attempted to return to crocheting.  I used to do a fair amount of it but it has been years and years ago.  I have found that 15-20 minutes every other day is my limit as it is extremely difficult with my arthritis so I’ve been looking for other things to occupy me.

 I’ve have just about run out of beads for other projects.  Dear husband took me to Hobby Lobby a little while back to acquire some beads and OH MY!  The prices have increased tremendously over the last few years.  This too will limit my ability to pursue jewelry making much more than I would like.  I was just getting started with jewelry with old beads I already had but have pretty much used them all up.   I’ve considered card making but am somewhat discouraged at the quality of homemade cards and my inability to gather the necessary equipment and supplies to make high quality cards.  Who knew you needed “equipment“ to make a card?  This also seems to be the standard for scrap-booking now.  Looking at the scrapbook I had put together over 10 years ago before all these new gadgets, techniques and supplies I am discouraged enough to not even bother because the level of quality with what I do have available to me is so below par that it is just better left alone because I’d never be happy with the results.  It seems the bar has been raised in all the areas I’d most like to get my hands in to but the purse is empty and I seem to have found myself at a roadblock.  Wow have I ever been out of the crafting world for a while!  

It seems like I won’t be making as much progress as I'd like in any one of these pursuits any time soon.  This is discouraging because I finally feel like doing something for a change.  Between feeling so poorly physically and the dark cloud of depression that covers me for long periods of time I just haven’t felt like doing ANYTHING.  Now I have some desire to do some things and find the resources much more limited than I ever imagined they’d be.  Patience in NOT one of my virtues, but discouragement is.  I’m trying very hard not to give up a glimmer of hope that I might eventually acquire the necessary supplies to progress in these activities.  After all physical limitations really limit the types of things I’m able to indulge in (other than chocolate).  It is easier to sit here and come up with a list of things I can’t do than it is to find the motivation to DO much of anything. 

 I am so grateful for the opportunity to do some indexing to keep my mind off the things that limit me so much.  I suppose that indexing and arbitration are my calling for now, and it IS an important thing to do.  That brings satisfaction to it too.  This is apparently the ‘season’ of my life to focus on things of this nature, The rest I suppose the good Lord will supply in due time.

 I suppose these are some of the places that I can’t recall where my time has went.  Of course there is much more that seemed important when it was in front of me but not important enough to remember afterwards.  Maybe my memory is just fading as I find myself getting older?  Sounds like a good excuse anyway.

I can attest to the truth that an idle mind (or hands) is the devils workshop. And I have felt the sky a little brighter when I have something I enjoy doing in front of me.  Depression, physical limitations, chronic pain and especially a fairly fresh empty nest has taken it’s toll and I hope brighter days are ahead.  I know staying distracted from these things does help and Lord knows the devil doesn’t need any more workers in his workshop!